I need to vent!
This planning a wedding malarky is really getting to me. I feel so disorganised and out of control with it all. Our registrar who also happens to be the Mum of one of our bridesmaids reassured me the other night that it's normal to feel that way and I'm probably a lot more organised than I realise.
I just feel like I've left a lot of things until the last minute, without realising that it would be stressful at the last minute.
And I'm trying to hard to be healthy, too, which also has me questioning myself.
Why is that whenever I feel anything other than contentment, I feel the urge to eat? It's like I don't know how to just feel my feelings, I have to eat them. And why do I feel so unstable a lot of the time?
And really panicky.
I get frustrated when people do things that I think shouldn't be done, or should be done differently.
Roll on honeymoon!!
Wednesday, January 4, 2012
|An array of wedding invites, mid-creation|
Having divorced parents mean that we generally celebrate Christmas twice, thus drawing out the festivities a little longer.
Celebrating the new year approached quickly, and went just as quickly, and this week I find myself in complete and utter wedding-meltdown-mode.
People ask what needs doing, and probably wonder what all the fuss is about, and maybe they're right. I probably am a little bit of a drama queen.
Equally, I want my day to perfect, and everything to be the way I envision it in my head. The to-do list does have loads of lovely big ticks next to it, which is nice. In terms of getting the bridal party kitted out, all that's left to do is get my flower girls and page boy a pair of shoes each... so much less daunting than actually finding and choosing dresses/suits!
My outfit is all sorted. Flowers are ordered. Cake is ordered. Our photographers are sorted. The groom and ushers outfits are sorted. All the invites have been sent (the very last few got sent today - I know, 3 weeks before our wedding.... organised or what!), my bridesmaids dresses are being altered accordingly and they're going to look beautiful. Yes, loads of lovely big ticks.
|Today's delegated job involves pretty ribbon!|
I'd like all the final details to be sorted by the week before the wedding, which gives us a little over two weeks. I sat with my sister in law (maid of honor) yesterday evening, to discuss what we need to do, and by when.
What a life saver she is!
It feels like only yesterday I was being her bridesmaid and the build up to her wedding was upon us... how have 6 years just faded and melted away.
Did I really travel the world in that time?
Have I really met the love of my life? Did he really propose marriage to me?
Am I really getting married at the end of this month?
It's happening, all right. I just need to take plenty of deep breaths. Anyone who knows me, knows that I almost always forget things, or leave my items laying around.... I'm particularly awful at remembering where I've put my mobile phone - people don't generally bother to call or text me because they know I won't get back to them for at least a few days until I come across my phone and discover 4 missed calls and 10 unread messages.
A few months before Christmas I organised all our "wedding bits" into boxes and put them away. Now that I've been rummaging through everything, I've realised there's a lot of things I can't actually find - including a few important invoices that need paying off this month.
Big, fat, OOOPS!
In two and a bit weeks, I'll be having my hen night, then enjoying a week with my Mum before the big day, which will include a day in London (yes, that includes a west end show... hello, this is me! I can't keep the "theatre girl" in me hidden deep in my soul for that long!) with my beautiful Swedish cousin, it also includes plenty of shopping, manicures and girl-time.
I'm very much looking forward to that week.
I'm also very much looking forward to getting married.
I'm also looking forward to our honeymoon!